Lower! Lower! Lower!
How much lower can I get?
I’m terrified to live
Cuz’ I’m filled with all this regret
Ashamed of what my daddy did to me
When my bedroom door was closed
Or my mother’s incessant need
To be so abusive and opposed
I could never give daddy enough
To keep him out of my bed
I tried my hardest to make mom happy
Instead she wound up dead
And every since – I’ve been spinning
Spiraling out of control
The roles I tried (for so long) to escape
Ended up swallowing me whole

Lower! Lower! Lower!
How much lower can I get?
I’m terrified to live
Cuz’ I’m filled with all this regret
Ashamed of the things my daddy did to me
While we were out in his shop
Or the way my mother taught me
To lie for her to that cop
I look back and reflect like FUCK
How did I come out alive?
Instead of lollipops and gummy bears
I was learning how to survive
Pretend to be asleep so daddy
Didn’t come in for a touch
And making sure not to leave streaks
On the glass of mama’s favorite hutch
Let’s not forget our Oscar performance
Every Sunday morning
Teaching me all there can be taught
About lies, sins, and conforming
Then we turn around, go back home
And do it all again
While day after day I begged for mercy
From a God I no longer have faith in

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